


titan sneezes

by SylphOfLight



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Ridiculous amounts of fluff, Sickfic, eren can't cook
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-19
Updated: 2014-03-19
Packaged: 2018-01-16 08:30:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1338826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SylphOfLight/pseuds/SylphOfLight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>As he tried to identify the bear-like war cry, Levi decided to quickly check up on Eren, to make sure, especially in his currently vulnerable state, he hadn’t been eaten or something. Cautiously, he peered into the bedroom, where a not-yet-eaten Eren sat, awake after his nap. The German boy blearily rubbed at his eyes, looking like the picture of adorable if not for the absolutely atrocious fucking terrifying utterly unbelievable roar coming from his mouth again, head thrown forwards from the sheer force of it. Then, he lifted his rumpled bed-head, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>  <i>Holy shit.</i></p><p> </p><p>  <i>“Holy shit, you sneeze like that?” </i></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>or, being ill might suck, but Eren knows his boyfriend will always take care of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	titan sneezes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [piratecats](https://archiveofourown.org/users/piratecats/gifts).



 

Eren was pretty sure he was dying.

 

Heaving coughs, wracking through his entire body?

Check.

 

A numbing cold, leaving his limbs heavy and tired?

Check.

 

Pathetic fallacy, the pouring wet rainclouds which were the icing on his deathly cake?

Check, check, check.

 

The German boy trudged miserably through the rain, hair plastered to his forehead, looking as dejected and hopeless as a suffering young adult could look. (The answer to that was _very_. Maybe even _incredibly_ so. Life sucked when you had just finished riding the high of college.) When he reached the door way of his house, he rummaged through his pockets, struggling to find his set of keys which would let him enter this warm, sweet sanctuary of a home.

As he (finally, _how long could searching for a stupid key take?_ ) unlocked the door and stepped inside, Eren called out to his boyfriend in a pitiful whimper.

 

“Levi, I’m dying.”

 

The only reply given was a noncommittal grunt from the kitchen.

Eren, who normally burst into a rant of some sort as soon as he opened the door (about his colleagues or some sort of social injustice or just about _anything_ really), simply stared at the wall, pouting like a brat. The cold was starting to get to him, shivers chilling his core and preventing him from raging on like he usually did. Maybe the silence would tell Levi that he genuinely, truly was going to die! So Eren stood there, hoping the quiet (well, excluding a few sniffles, but who was counting?)  would unnerve Levi enough to actually do his job as a boyfriend (what kind of a shitty excuse for a boyfriend didn’t check up on the other when they were _clearly_ on their last legs? Shitty ones, that’s who). As the minutes ticked by and his childish game of weird reverse psychology (so maybe Armin would tell him that that term wasn’t completely correct but man, he was tired so _lay off, okay brain Armin?_ ) clearly wasn’t working, Eren decided to shed his jacket and boots, about to toss them nonchalantly onto the floor when –

 

“I just mopped that floor Jaeger, don’t you dare drop your shit stained clothes onto it. Or I’m banning sex. Forever.”

 

Eren looked up at Levi, apron-clad and waving a chef’s knife threateningly, suddenly standing in front of him. ( _Goddamn_ Levi using his _goddamn_ scary ninja skills.)

 

“Leeeviii,” Eren whined, stretching the vowels of Levi’s name, like he always did when he was going to put on his puppy-eyed look act. “I’m ill! You’ve got to be a good boyfriend and look after me.”

 

A steel gaze flicked up and down his body, and ( _RED ALERT DO NOT LOOK INTO JAEGER’S EYES)_ as he made eye contact, ( _I REPEAT DO NOT LOOK INTO THE EYES_ ) Levi experienced the melting sensation of compassion, ( _GOD DAMN IT LEVI YOU SHIT-FOR-BRAINS)_ and set the knife down, before helping Eren hang up his jacket onto the coat hooks (which were an arm’s reach away and the lazy fuck was _still_ about to throw it onto the floor), and set his muddy, absolutely disgusting (future note: _burn later_ ) boots to one side.

 

“Go upstairs and wait,” Levi instructed the shivering, now sneezing, boy. “I’ll run you a bath.”

 

One grateful watery grin, way too much bubble bath, and an impromptu water fight later, Eren was bundled up in the fluffiest bath robe the two could find, curled up on their bed, sitting in a giant pillow-and-duvet pile. The boy currently wrapped up like a burrito looked up at Levi, sleepy affection written across his face. He managed a murmured _thanks Levi, love you_ , before falling asleep.

 

Once Levi had checked the other was fast asleep, he let himself smile, (just a little tug at each corner), but a smile nonetheless. (Can’t do it when Eren was awake, it’d ruin his carefully crafted hardcore image. Because he _wasn’t_ a weird loser. _Nope. Not. At. All_.)

A few hours later, Levi was once again interrupted. (He was just texting Hanji about the pros and cons of getting a cat, they ought to know judging that their house was essentially a few animals short of a zoo. _Crazy shitty glasses freak_.) However, instead of being distracted by a whiny Eren, it was – well, how the fuck could he describe it?

It was a roar, louder than anything he’d experienced. A gravelly noise, which sounded like someone was getting brutally murdered. The scrape of nails against a blackboard was a more comfortable sound than what he’d just heard.

As he tried to identify the bear-like war cry, Levi decided to quickly check up on Eren, to make sure, especially in his currently vulnerable state, he hadn’t been eaten or something. Cautiously, he peered into the bedroom, where a not-yet-eaten Eren sat, awake after his nap. The burrito boy blearily rubbed at his eyes, looking like the picture of adorable if not for the _absolutely atrocious fucking terrifying utterly unbelievable_ roar coming from his mouth again, head thrown forwards from the sheer force of it. Then, he lifted his rumpled bed-head, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

 

Holy shit.

 

“Holy shit, you sneeze like that?” Levi had to ask, unwilling to believe what he had just witnessed.

 

“Um, yeah? Why what’s wrong with it? Oh, by the way, can you pass me a tissue?”

 

The older man blinked, still slightly stunned through his latest discovery.

He dropped a pack of tissues from the bedside drawer into Eren’s lap, and then wordlessly walked out of the bedroom. Eren stared in confusion at his shocked boyfriend. (Oh, so Captain Clean can handle spiders in bathrooms and equally terrifying stuff, but _a sneeze_ was too much for him? Go figure, jeez.)

Eren wiped his nose, draped a duvet around his shoulders, (totally going for the regal look, _obviously_ ) and slowly plodded to the kitchen, planning on making himself some soup. Okay, maybe it was true that he couldn’t cook even on the best of days. (He had fucked up _boiled eggs_ the other day. Levi wasn’t particularly pleased at the scorch marks on the ceiling, nor willing to clean up the salty egg-splosion covering almost a half of the entire kitchen.) However, since he was ill, the sniffling boy was convinced that due to karma or some shit that the universe _owed him_. It owed him some good things in his life, and those good things would probably take the form of cooking skills. Right? Right.

Anyway, his quivering stomach could almost certainly only handle soup right now, which only involved shoving some Heinz Chicken and Mushroom Soup in the microwave. (Levi hadn’t allowed Eren near the hob ever since _The Accident_.)

 

So, first step: get tin.

 

Second step: open tin.

 

Third step: shove into microwave for 5 or so minutes.

 

Fourth step:  Sit back, smell the _glorious_ aroma of soup and **_holy shit why is the tin on fire you fucked up kiddo_**

Transfixed, Eren stared at the revolving soup, which happened to also be spitting sparks and flames. He didn't know how much time had passed before Levi was standing next to him, wrenching the microwave door open, staring despairingly, but at Eren’s poor cooking skills or the wrecked tin of soup, Eren wasn't sure.

 

“So…” the duvet-clad boy began hesitantly. “I guess the soup is done?”

 

Levi put on his most intimidating expression. “Eren. You are now officially banned from doing anything other than lay in bed while you’re ill, you shithead. I didn't even know you could fuck up microwavable soup. But you did it. Congratu-fucking-lations. So go back to bed and I’ll bring you some new soup.”

 

“But Leeeviii –“

 

“Go. Bed. Now.”

 

Admitting defeat, Eren trudged back to the bedroom, overhearing Levi mutter about how _Mikasa was a goddamn saint for putting up with this for the whole of her childhood_. He rolled around in the sheets to kill time (no, as in literally, _not like that_ , take your mind out of the gutter.) W _ow,_ this whole sleeping thing was getting _boring_. Maybe he could text Armin to take him out to somewhere more interesting than the beige walls of his bedroom. Jean might be up to some shenanigans, but, oh wait, he had a date with Marco tonight, didn’t he? Perhaps he could ask Annie for a sparring session? That was, if she wasn’t probably sparring with Mikasa right now. _Damn._

As Eren mulled over his options, he almost didn't notice Levi holding a bowl of home-made _heaven_ in his hands (actually, it was probably chicken noodle soup, but it smelt like _bliss_ ).

Levi sat beside him, carding long fingers through brown ruffled hair as the younger bolted down the entire bowl.

 

“Holy shit, mmm, this stuff is – ah, hot – literally the, mmmhh, best thing I’ve ever had,” Eren praised between long slurps.

 

Levi snorted. “Glad you like it.”

 

The soup had been wolfed down before it even had time to cool down from its previous stage of _hotter than Satan’s testicles_. Eren pushed the empty soup bowl away and wrapped his arms around Levi’s neck, becoming extra affectionate in his soup-filled state.

For the first few kisses, or rather, attempts of kisses, Levi turned his head away, grumbling about how Eren was ill, but after a bit of coaxing and a healthy dose of puppy eyes, ( _WE TOLD YOU ABOUT THE PUPPY GAZE WE WARNED YOU)_ Levi responded warmly, slipping a tongue between Eren’s lips, all puffy and swollen from his cold, but still so, so, warm. The German boy hummed contently and let his hands slip under Levi’s shirt, feeling the fluttering muscles underneath his touch, and relishing the small moan he managed to prise out of his boyfriend. Just as Eren started to gently roll his hips onto the other’s lap, Levi pulled away and nudged the younger one onto his side.

 

“You’re ill, you brat, remember?” he admonished lightly.

 

“And that means –” Levi said, pulling the covers over Eren’s body,

 

“You have to get your rest –” an eye-roll at Eren’s ridiculous pouting,

 

“So you can’t spread your germs around and –” cue aggressive tucking in,

 

“You’re feeling better as soon as possible.” Levi finished with a forceful kiss to his boyfriend’s forehead.

 

Eren looked like he was about to protest but decided against it. He simply gave an exasperated sigh, before obediently shutting his eyes.

However, as he closed his eyes, he heard the most adorable sound. A kitten snorting, maybe. It sounded like a mouse had just puffed out a tiny huff of air. That sound could melt the heart of a murderer. As Eren’s eyes flew open, staring at Levi, looking like the picture of intimidation if not for the _completely endearing super cute utterly miniscule_ squeak coming from his mouth again, eyes squeezed shut. Then, his eyes opened, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

 

 

Holy shit.

 

 

“Holy shit Levi, you sneeze like that?”

 

 

  

**Author's Note:**

> when levi sneezes, it sounds like a tiny 'hei-choo'


End file.
